Closure

I'm still in awe at this point I brought myself to.
I opened my heart and soul to see everything through you.
Wishing and believing all of your words were true,
But the actions you spoke I still can't help but to believe that wasn't you.

I get that people change it's a part of day-to-day life,
But why play the games if you knew it was you that I liked.
Forget the word like, it feels so incredibly wrong,
You and I in this situation, the love you said was so strong.

Strong enough to surpass any obstacles in our way--
Who knew that those obstacles would expire one day.
Who knew that one day in the end nothing would matter,
All of those words and feelings you would simply let shatter.
Like dropping a glass on the floor and watching it fall,
Realizing the outcome yet watching me call.
Don't answer the phone, think of any excuse in book,
Don't answer my messages, don't even look.

I can't believe I was so stupid to believe your petty lies,
I just hoped that one day I could actually look in your eyes.
The eyes of the person that said we were meant to be,
Your soul mate, your one, you were everything to me.
Yet you were the one that used those words in our conversation,
Did you just get off on complete domination?
Knowing and hearing I would love you until the end of time,
Were you just joking and laughing on the other end of the line?

I've learned that in life there are lessons to be taught,
I know that heartbreak though is typically something fought.
Maybe it was my fault, maybe I let myself down.
Maybe that's why I'm left picking up these pieces on the ground.
I sit back though sometimes and can't help to think,
What were you really feeling, why did you blink?
Why did you hesitate?
Because you've changed that much?
You're still the person that claimed to long for my touch.
Who's chimed in on my relationships saying these guys weren't right for me,
Constantly telling me it is was you and I that were always meant to be.

Years and years of built up feelings and one very long flight,
I struggled sleeping on the plane through that very dark night.
Built up anticipation and a wondering heart and mind,
Curiosity was killing me and it was killing me in due time.
Almost time to fulfill the promise I made so long ago,
To see you, hug you--but then let you go.
You see I always knew that our relationship in the end couldn't work,
Because it felt like it was built on something that deep down, always hurt.

Does that make me like you, to destroy something we didn't physically know?
To end something to crucial, without going with life's flow?
I think we're both at fault, I blame myself I didn't come then.
I blame you now though, I followed through with my promises when you kept asking me, "you're coming...when?"
I came, I saw, I did what I needed to do,
It just sucks that you only did what you felt was best for you.
"I've changed, I'm not the same person that you used to know",
It would have been really nice knowing that planning my trip around your little show.

Everyone deserves a clean break, a release to forget your past,
But I'll never forget someone putting me on their list dead last.
I know what I want and I know it's better than you,
I know where I'm going and I know what I have to do.
I hope you find what's missing from your life and it completes your empty heart,
But here's to me hoping that you realize you had it from the start.

--AE